I've been looking forward to this post since I started the blog!  You could call this "God Told Me We Should Date - Part 2"  This is for every girl who's ever been pursued and didn't know how to let the boy down easily.  Girls, you are wonderful, I know you don't want to be mean.  I know boys put you in an awkward place when they lay it out on the line, so here's how to let him know you are not interested in him, in 8 simple steps.

     Just before I get into the steps, you don't need to engage these steps only when you know someone likes you.  Girls are notorious for not picking up on the signs that a boy likes her.  Men out there, how often have you told a girl that a guy is interested in her and she replies with a, "No way!  We're just friends!" when you know for a matter of fact that he's head over heels for her?  In fact, this blog post originated as a message to a friend of mine that didn't know how to let a boy know she wasn't interested after I presented her with proof that he was, indeed, quite interested.  You can pretty much always use these steps just to be safe.  So here we go (this is a cut & paste of the aforementioned message, with the names changed of course)...

K, 93% of boys will pick up on these hints, however, 7% will not and you may just have to be rude.

How to subtly let a boy you are not interested:

Step 1: Mention other boys' names to him, but don't make it obvious, bring them up in conversation. This let's him know he's not the only player in the game. For example: Boy says, "What's new Sarah?" Sarah replies, "Not much, just went for supper last night with Matthew."

Now the boy does not need to know that Matthew is your older brother, the less he knows about the other boys the better. If you really want to bring home your uninterest, throw in a compliment about the boy you were with. Boy says, "Hey Sarah, what's new?" Sarah says, "Not much Boy, just hanging out with Troy tonight, I'm excited cause he plays guitar and we love singing together." At this point listen carefully because you just may be able to here the boy's heart break a little. Do not mention that Troy is the married leader of your worship team until the boy has safely moved on and is dating someone else.

Step 2: Compare him to people with zero dateable potential, this let's him know you see him as being as dateable as a potato. Never compare him to your father because everyone knows that (at least in theory) girls are attracted to boys who have similar character traits to their fathers. For example, "Has anyone ever told you that you look kinda like Ellen Degeneres? (also you could use Rosie O'donnell, Michael Moore, Grandparents, Santa Clause or Stephen Harper. Never compare him to your father, Johnny Depp, Brad Pitt or James Dean.... or your youth pastor )

Step 3: Only give him safe compliments or compliments with an addendum. This let's him know you are indeed a nice person, but not secretly trying to hint to him that the ball is rolling.

Safe Compliment: "Your youth group looks like so much fun"
Compliment with an addendum: "That was fun hanging out with you guys, it was awesome to get to know Samantha and Brad is so funny!" or if you laugh at one of his jokes say something like, "That's funny, you remind me of our senior pastor, except he's in his 60's."

Step 4: Whenever the talk turns to relationships of any kind tell him that you really enjoy being single (this let's him think that he is dateable for someone, but that you truly aren't in a place to let the ball begin rolling). Tell him that being free of a relationship with a guy really allows you to work on your relationship with God (hopefully this is a true statement, remember, if you believe it it's not a lie.) Also, throw in (and make sure he clearly hears this next statement) "I know that when I meet the right guy I'll know it, and I haven't felt that yet with anyone I know."

Step 5: Encourage him to think about other girls. This is a near fail-proof way to show boys you aren't interested, once again, there are boys who will completely miss this, they are the dangerous ones that will eventually ask you out no matter what and you might have to be rude. If he mentions another girl, don't jump on that right away. There's a chance that he'll mention all these great girls just to see how you'll react but when you hint that maybe there's a spark there for him and this other girl, it gives him a chance to say she's not quite what he's looking for and let you know that you are quite what he's looking for.

Wait until he expresses some interest, he may even try to disguise it by saying something like, "What if a guy kinda liked two girls, one he gets along great with and they like each other, but he likes the other one more but doesn't know if she feels the same?"  (ps. he may also do this but leave out the first girl) In case you didn't already pick it up, he's the boy and you're the girl that he doesn't know if she likes him or not. Tell him things like, "I couldn't imagine you with a blonde (or whatever your hair colour happens to be)" or direct him to the girl that you are positive is not you.

Also, tell him you know girls that would be perfect for him, preferably girls that you are willing to send him to or girls there's no chance he'll ever meet. For example, "You would love my friend Miranda, you guys have the same sense of humor." You could throw in something like, "Me and Miranda are nothing alike but I think you guys would hit it off for sure."

Step 6: Deflect all compliments and gifts. This gives you the appearance of humility and lets him know that you're not basking in the glow of his affection. For example, he gives you flowers, ask him if it's ok if you give them to your mom cause she's having a rough day. If he says you have a beautiful smile say, "Do you know who has an amazing smile? My friend Miranda." Also, if he compliments you in written form just ignore it, change the subject.

Step 7: Let him know you are definitely looking for different things in the future.  For example, if he wants lots of kids you're not sure you want any.  He likes to travel the world you like to stay at home and watch tv.  He loves cats you want to hit them with your car.  He wants a stay at home wife and you want to be a senior pastor.

Finally, Step 8: In texts, emails, FBs, Tweets and the like, always take your time to reply. This lets him know he's not your priority. If he writes on your wall, write his back after you've already written on mutual friends' walls.

For example, you go on a group outing with him, you could write on Samantha's wall, "It was so awesome to meet you.  I love your taste in music!"  Then write on Brad's wall, "It was so cool hanging out with guys!  I'm going to beat your score next time!" Then write on Boy's wall something like, "Hey that was so cool hanging out. I like bowling alot, especially since I rarely do it."  If he's paying attention to his mini feed he'll notice that you DID compliment Samantha but not him, also he'll notice you left the door open to go bowling with Brad but not him.  This let's him know that bowling was the highlight of your evening and not the chance to be around him.

So there you go, 8 simple steps to showing a boy your disinterest. I know it's long but this is important stuff. Once again, you may follow these steps completely and he may still end up asking you out. At that point tell him you're married to Jesus and can't date because God is a jealous God.

Feel free to forward this to all of your girl friends.  Subscribe to the blog.  Leave your comments, they make me happier than you know.